Insomnia and other animals...

Tomorrow's another day, I tell myself each night as I toss and turn in a vain attempt at catching some sleep before tomorrow morphs into today. Thoughts keep bulletting their way through my head, piercing every cell that crosses their path and depriving me of my much needed Z's. My job, my ex, my past, the weather, my cats, this other guy, poetry, shooting stars, my parents, my life.....

My life. This is my life. Day in, day out, the story of my life. These thoughts go on and on, becoming louder by the minute, and before I know it my alarm reminds me it's time to go to work. Great. Another sleepless night. My cats make sure I'm up before the snooze alarm sets in, lest I think of having a lie-in, so painfully, I go through all the motions and drive to work in a half-zombified state.

What was it that caused this insomnia? I'm no longer with my ex, so that can't be it. His lies and emotional blackmail no longer affect me. My job? I'm happy in this job. I do worry about my parents, but I don't think they're the reason I'm awake at night. They were always fixed worries, and I have managed to sleep before. Cats are fine, the weather doesn't affect me, the past is past and the future is unknown. So what is it?

All these thoughts keep gushing through my mind, and I feel restless. I get the unsettling feeling that this is it. This is what mt life will be like from now on. And I'm not talking about the insomnia. I mean everything in general - my job, my mates, my array of misshapen relationships with men who always turn out to be Mr. Wrong, my self image, my ambitions. Where are my ambitions? Where have they gone? The me I am now is a direct result of the me of the past, just as the me of today is writing the character profile of tomorrow's me. This is it. I know it's silly....but is this all? How can I change the effect of today's me on my future? Where would I begin? I wish I could fill tomorrow with poetry and shooting stars but is it what life is really about? What if I'm just daydreaming....what if it's not even as exciting as that....what if....

What if I'm right?

Every new beginning.....

And thus a new adventure begins.

Friday was my last day at Actavis. The very last day dealing with tablets, their manufacture, development, marketing....the last day with my fantastic colleagues. Yes, my mug had to be packed and brought back home, because tomorrow I embark on a new adventure with a new boss, new colleagues, and a brand new job description.

What's going on, you ask? You're right....I haven't been very good with the updates. Well, to summarize, here's what happened:

I was offered the job in Venice, but it paid peanuts and I turned it down because the actual job wasn't that exciting. The only appeal was in its location.

Kittens arrived - Max and Jude - two real cuties, but such a handful!

So where will I be driving to tomorrow morning, if not to Actavis?

The answer is Heritage Malta. I will be a Scientist for the diagnostics lab. The job is basically like CSI, but instead of dead bodies I'll be dealing with works of art :o) Quality!!! Finally I found a channel through which I can combine my passion for art and culture with my background in science...without even having to leave the island! Am I hyped about it? Sure! Am I shit scared? Hell of course I am! I've never even dreamt of ever being offered such a fantastic opportunity....so I'll be damned if I let it pass by. I used to joke with my mum and tell her that my ideal job would see me abseiling down the walls of the Sistine Chapel, restoring its murals. Well, I won't be doing any restoration, but this is pretty damn close.

I can't wait to start. It was so sad to leave me friends behind - I made some very special friends at my other workplace. But friends will be friends wherever one goes....and every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end...

Till next time!

It's Friday....

World cup fever...work....kittens arriving tomorrow....kitty supply shopping this afternoon...work...(no) sleep....need sleep....must sleep....so much to do....so little time to do it in....

It's the end of the week. Friday. Not just any Friday....a special Friday. A week has passed since THE Friday. The big assessment day that drained my every sliver of energy, but gave me a wealth of experience. THAT day.

They said they'd let us know in three weeks. Three. 1, 2, 3...that's 21 days worth of curiosity, thoughts, ramblings, dreams....disillusions and cynicism. It seemed like forever, but one week has already gone by. So it's one down, two more to go!

The World Cup kicks off today...it's been 4 years already. I was in Birmingham last World Cup. This time I'm in Malta. Who knows....maybe next time I'll be somewhere else....

Today I couldn't concentrate at work. Way too much going on in my life right now. After work I went shopping for kitty supplies...they arrive tomorrow!! Little fluffy joys!! :o) All's good.

Meanwhile, I'm off to eat Indian....yum!

All in a week's work...

Rewind to Wednesday, last week.

Funny, I thought, waking up late on a weekday. I had booked the day off, and I didn't need to be in town till 10:45. I took my time to have breakfast, chose my clothes carefully, applied an adequate amount of eye makeup (OK fine...and quite a dose of concealer for that boulder that decided to show up on my chin overnight), and caught the bus into town with my dad.

"Nothing to lose" I kept telling myself. "I've got nothing to lose." So I walked into the Heritage office wearing my best smile....

The following morning I woke up as usual, packed my lunch, and got to work at 6am. My work day was pretty short that day. At 11 o'clock on the dot, I picked my bag, said bye to everyone and drove home. My parents were ready, and in less than half an hour I was at the airport. Two flights and a nail later, I was in sunny Venice, with its gondolas, canals, and lovely Italian vibe. I should have eaten a little earlier that evening because at night I was restless, thoughts flitting through my head, and no comfortable sleeping position to be found. The late dinner may have had nothing to do with it at all; in fact, it was probably just nerves in anticipation for Friday. I just said to myself "Nothing to lose; remember, you've got nothing to lose. Just enjoy it and make the most of it." Had I known what I was to face the next day, I would have probably popped a tranquilizer or something, to calm my nerves if nothing else.

Fast forward

Saturday morning was hectic - I was on autopilot and I honestly don't remember much of the two flights back home. I just know I was exhausted and had a bad migraine, so I went to bed as soon as I got home.

The next two days are just a haze....between pain killers, cold cloths on my forehead, and brief snippets of the previous few days replaying over and over, in no logical order, in my head. Good job Monday was a holiday here. There was no way I could have gone to work in that delusional semi-conscious state.

This morning I woke up feeling pretty energized, got to work at 6, and had a relatively normal day. Looking back at the me one week ago, I just think "Heh....you just don't know what's about to hit you, girl!"

....or was it a dream?!

The Usual Drill (that comes with every intro)...

Well, hi there everyone!

After a long pause and a break from the blogosphere, here I am once again, putting not so much pen to paper, as fingertips to keyboard, as we embark upon yet another blog venture together. Much has gone on during the past year - some tales worth relating, others better kept hidden under a dusty carpet for the time being. But all in all, a good year. One filled with unexpected surprises and a few fairytale-like twists. Will I attempt to fill you in today, in this introductory post? Fear not, I won't. I will just recount, as days go by, the new exciting events as they unfold before me, with the occasional anecdote reminiscent of the past year strewn in for good measure.

This is a new era for a hopeless dreamer. Will the rambling Piscean ever find her elusive reality?